Well, the Liberal Media's doing it again: they're trying to make reality out of fantasy. 

They're like randy bachelorette party attendees who, when policemen appear at the door, proceed to tug and tear at their uniforms insisting that they must be strippers when in fact they really are just policemen responding to a public disturbance complaint regarding what the caller said sounds like "a charging horde of Vikings with a vibrator."

But anyone who watched for themselves on September 30—instead of relied on the reactions of Left-"wing" pundits—could see that Kerry definitely did not win that debate.

Then, others say to me, "The American people were the real winners of that debate!" Nope. As a matter of fact, due to the rules, it's impossible for "the American people" to win the debate because most of them weren't even debating.

Still others declare, "The third guy who was up there.  The one with the eye patch ...What's his name? You know, the one who proposed the plan that he proved would end all poverty within a year. Well, he won." Again, no.

Nope.  None of these things won.

The winner was our greatest ever President, George W. Bush.

I know because I was there^* and watched the whole thing. And more.

Now, hey. I agree: Kerry was very good at what he usually does: spouting a litany of empty but catchy slogans: "We can do better!" or "And I believe [we need] a fresh start, new credibility, a president who can understand what we have to do to reach out to the Muslim world!" or "I have a better plan to be able to fight the war on terror by strengthening our military, strengthening our intelligence, by going after the financing more authoritatively, by doing what we need to do to rebuild the alliances, by reaching out to the Muslim world, which the president has almost not done, and beginning to isolate the radical Islamic Muslims, not have them isolate the United States of America!"

Clever?  Sure.  Catchy?  Yup.  Easy to remember?  Yes, ma'am.  Bodacious?  I suppose...maybe...???

Contain any substance whatsoever? No.

Even the most cursory scrutiny of these mantras reveals that they say nothing more than that we need to work with the Muslim world and coordinate with our allies and work on improving our intelligence and improve the work against terrorist financing and blah blah blah. And, frankly, it's the very last item of this list that's of any interest.

But "Mr." Kerry provides no details: When will his training of Iraqi police begin? Will the trainees get per diems for lunch, or will there be a cafeteria-like structure?  Which Rangers exactly will he have go around the back of al-Zarkawi's hideout while the rest pose a decoy attack at the front? Is this even the best way to capture al-Zarkawi?  Sure seems too simple to me.  This is the most dangerous terrorist out there, and we're going to just do a simple decoy thing?

Sorry, Liberal Elite: Your candidate's "plans" are just empty, yummy bumper sticker-sized bon bons that our press can put in their papers like a mother puts up his/her 6 year-old's art work on the fridge and exclaims, "This art is no good, but you're just a kid, so I'm very impressed!  Yay!  Whoopee!  Now, watch TV while Mommy lays down again because her head hurts."

Meanwhile, Bush opened up at the debate and revealed that the war is "hard work" and that "We're making progress." I never thought of it that way before—that the war is hard work—but I guess it kinda makes sense if you think about how our soldiers are being shot at, which can cause death.  So, see? That is a great insight for the American voter.

And like the best of the haiku that the kids are into these days, our President's simple statements say more than just what the words or the meaning of those words say: "It's hard work" says to me that we just have to keep plugging away; we must not surrender to the Evil Doers; and that Pfc. Byron Jones, Pfc. Ed Garcia, Spec. Angel Lopez, and Sgt. Patrick Edwards would be the best ones to go around the back of al-Zarkawi's hideout (if we do the decoy thing).

Listen: Kerry is a flip-flopper: About this war and about everything else. Do we really want that in our President? Sure, it'd be nice. But we can't afford that luxury now.

We need what Bush offers: strength or something.

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^* Wherever in Florida the debate was held.