Mafia Name Generator Web Site to IPO

New York, NY - The nation appears ready to come out of what cannot be best described as the used, slight spaghetti sauce-scented Tupperware of the Dot-com collapse. Once again, after more than five years, several companies are poised to place themselves on the trading boards of the NYSE (New York Stock Exchange) and the NASDAQ (whatever that might stand for) through an initial public offering (IPO).

Among them this month is the Mafia Name Generator Web site (http://pages.prodigy.net/mlemus/mobnamegenerator.htm). Using proprietary technology developed through the efforts of industry-leading idea people and engineers, this Web site is able to provide a Mafia nickname per a first and last name input into the site’s Web page.

“Sure enough, it works,” reported Dr. Sanford Wang, Dean of Computer Sciences at Fordham University. “I typed in ‘Tony’ and ‘Delmanico’ as the names and it returns with the nickname ‘The Mortician.’ And that’s precisely the correct mob nickname for someone of this formal name. I’m still not sure how this technology works. It’s astounding.”

“The Web site serves an obvious need and also has so much growth potential. It’s barely touched the tip of the iceberg,” said Janet “The Abalone” Greeley, technology analyst for that financial firm where the old guy said, “We make money the old fashioned way–We earn it.” “For example,” Greeley continued, “this technology can even be used to give Mafia nicknames to inanimate objects.” Realizing that may seem unbelievable, Greeley demonstrated. Typing “waffle” into the first name field and “iron” in the last name field, Greeley clicked the simple “Gimme my fuckin’ nickname” button on the site. Sure enough, the Web site returned with “Frankenberry.”

“If they figure out how to generate a nickname for even one-worded items, this company will change the funny name generator industry. Needless to say, they’ll at least enjoy some incredible share prices and great long-term success.” And the nickname for “long-term success”? “The Delicious.”

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