Uh, hey. Donnie. Listen, gots more drinks on our menu. Here’s what they are and all that. Remember, when the factory whistle blows, come right on over to Donnie’s. You’re not required to shower off the coal dust and blood ‘afore you come in like you are at them other bars.
The Silver Surfer – A bracing blend of ouzo, ice, mercury, steel, and paperwork.
SnapShot! – A suspension of silver chloride in a gelatin coated onto an ester of acetic acid. The exact same blend found in old cameras!
The Randy Ox – Yes, mixing bleach with ammonia is deadly, but the resulting flavor is delightful. This cocktail brings together Windex and Clorox with an orange rind twist into a drink that will cause you to die.
The Dainty Lady – An ocean of whiskey being traversed by war-tested battleships and swum in by capsized refugees who’ve been dipped in anise liqueur. Beware: sheer size of cocktail can alter the world’s wind currents and thus its weather and thusly its food output.