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Gibson Apologizes for Anti-Semitic Remarks, Blames Them on His Drunken State and Jews
Los Angeles, CA - In a statement issued by his publicist, actor and director Mel Gibson, 50, who’s starred in such movies as “Lethal Weapon 3″ and one where he can hear what women are thinking, apologized for his anti-Semitic slurs made towards the officers who arrested him for suspicion of driving while under the influence of alcohol early Friday morning. “I acted like a person completely out of control when I was arrested and said things that I do not believe to be true and which are despicable,” said Gibson, who isn’t as handsome as he used to be. “I let alcohol do this to me and have been fighting its hold on me all my adult life. Also, I feel that the Jewish people, who I feel are a wonderful people by the way, are to blame for the awful things I said against their people.” He went on to explain that he certainly is not anti-Semitic and posited, “What other way to explain how I could say those things that I simply do not believe, except that I was manipulated in a way that only the Heeb powers-that-be in Hollywood could pull off?”
Gibson is known to hold the beliefs that the Nazi Holocaust never occurred (”What evidence is there, aside from pictures, testimony of survivors, and concentration camps that are still standing? Almost nothing!”) and that Jesus is son of God (”I know this is true because the Bible says.”). The star, probably best known for his role as Ray Henderson in the 70s Australian soap opera “The Sullivans,” also made a separate apology to the woman officer who was involved in the arrest. “I’m also very embarrassed by my behavior toward Officer Sugartits, who was just trying to do her job properly.”


August 1st, 2006 at 12:34 pm
Very, very funny, except for the bit about the Jews, Jesus, God, the police, used-to-be-good looking Mel, and officer Sugartits.
Jg.
August 2nd, 2006 at 6:14 pm
The ZOG machine is after you, Mel.
And to think you made the permed mullet (pullet) stylish.
Shlomo and I would like to smash your head against the Wailing Wall.
August 4th, 2006 at 9:44 am
You see what happens when you drink German ale all night?